Jekyll2022-02-15T18:38:58+00:00https://mcmanus.io/atom.xmlMatt McManusThe thoughts and deeds of Matt McManusMatt McManusBook Review: Ancillary Justice by Ann Leckie2019-08-08T00:00:00+00:002019-08-08T00:00:00+00:00https://mcmanus.io/2019/book-review-ancillary-justice<p>I first heard about this book while reading <a href="https://fivebooks.com/best-books/summer-reading-2019-the-best-of-sci-fi-tom-hunter-arthur-c-clarke/">a sci-fi summer reading list on FiveBooks</a>. It won the Hugo, Nebula AND Arthur C. Clark award. How could I not read it?</p>
<p>The book’s genre is standard Space Opera. In this universe, powerful AIs reside in military ships for thousands of years. They operate, not only through all the ships’ sensors and computers, but through humans, known as ancillarys. You begin the book by joining one AI 20 years into a mission of revenge after they were left trapped in a single ancillary body.</p>
<p>I enjoyed much of this book. The universe is compelling; its history and religions are intriguing. I am, however, on the fence about some of the techniques Leche used to write the story. The main civilization, the Radch, does not have gendered pronouns, nor are their adults distinctly gendered. The main character spends <em>a lot</em> of time fussing about which pronouns to use for folks outside of the Radch empire. Otherwise, everyone is always referred to as she. There are many characters whose gender was indeterminable. This fussing and ambiguity was distracting at first, but became less so within the first 20% of the book.</p>
<p>Leche used one other interesting technique in the book. The AIs are single identities which could inhabit many bodies. This enabled them to participate in several events simultaneously. In one sentence, you are in one place, the next another. This was disorienting at times. I’m tempted to call this and the gender ideas tricks, as they did little to contribute to the fullfillment of the story arch. But I will not, because their execution was solid and, ultimately, interesting.</p>
<p>In the end, a good science fiction book is about the seeds of ideas they plant. The writing, the characters, the universe, all exist as vehicles for them. This book’s seeds are an exploration of identity, the nature of selfhood and how we draw the lines for what we define humanity. For that, I am glad I read it.</p>Matt McManusI first heard about this book while reading a sci-fi summer reading list on FiveBooks. It won the Hugo, Nebula AND Arthur C. Clark award. How could I not read it?Book Review: The Old Man and the Sea by Ernest Hemingway2018-09-10T00:00:00+00:002018-09-10T00:00:00+00:00https://mcmanus.io/2018/book-review-old-man-and-the-sea-ernest-hemingway<p>Like seemingly many classics, I missed reading this in high school. Honestly, I’m glad I did, though not right away. I took me a time to realize that I wasn’t disappointed in the book, but disapointed for Santiago, the old man. That’s when I realized just how much I appreciated this sad and beauitful book.</p>
<blockquote>
<p>He was too simple to wonder when he had attained humility. But he knew he had attained it and he knew it was not disgraceful and it carried no loss of true pride.</p>
</blockquote>
<p>What I’m left with is a deep sense of affection and respect for the Old Man. I admire his confounding persistence and will power in the face of defeat. I think what surprised me most was how much I admired his respect for the fish. It’s a deeply paradoxical relationship. To respect something so much while also trying to destroy it.</p>
<blockquote>
<p>You are killing me, fish, the old man thought. But you have a right to. Never have I seen a greater, or more beautiful, or a calmer or more noble thing than you, brother. Come on and kill me. I do not care who kills who.</p>
</blockquote>
<p>This is my first taste of Hemingway, and I’m glad I read it. I look forward to reading him again.</p>Matt McManusLike seemingly many classics, I missed reading this in high school. Honestly, I’m glad I did, though not right away. I took me a time to realize that I wasn’t disappointed in the book, but disapointed for Santiago, the old man. That’s when I realized just how much I appreciated this sad and beauitful book.I don’t want to but I’m giving functional CSS a try2018-08-26T00:00:00+00:002018-08-26T00:00:00+00:00https://mcmanus.io/2018/i-dont-want-to-but-im-giving-functional-CSS-a-try<p>I’ve been writing CSS for a long time. I like it and it makes sense to me. I’m often bewildered by folks who have such a hard time with it. I was raised on Eric Meyer’s and Jeffery Zeldman’s Web standards and semantic html purity laws. Those ideas are buried deep in my psyche. However, you may not have noticed, but web development has changed a lot in the last 20 years! I’ve learned many new things over that time, but it’s been a long time since I’ve evaluated where I stand with CSS. For this post, I’m not going to do a detailed how-to or deep dive. I’m going to walk you through some thoughts and observations I’ve had as I take my first stab at functional css. Let’s begin!</p>
<h2 id="unlearning">Unlearning</h2>
<p>One of the primary tenets of the ol’ semantic HTML dogmas is the separation of content and presentation. What this means is your HTML should consist of simple, semantic descriptions of you content. If it’s properly done, it should be free from any information related to the visual display of that content. Your CSS should contain all visual information, organized with semantic class names. I love this pattern for developing websites and you should too. It’s powerful in its simplicity and elegance.</p>
<p>The question, as always with any technical pattern, is how far do you take it and what is “correct”. The heaven that this semantic markup approach preached was the ability to redesign your site without changing any markup. Swap out a css file to achieve zen!</p>
<p>After 15 years of writing css, had I ever achieved zen? Well…no. The reality is the second you add that extra div to aid in the styling of a certain set of elements, you’ve embedded visual dependencies into your markup. The more you do that, the likelihood of your markup surviving a redesign dwindles. It’s only recently that tooling such as flexbox and css grid, have made this practically attainable.</p>
<p>Component focused development has helped to reduce duplication and provide clear guidance on how to organize your styles. But it can still be haphazard and messy work. It’s also impossible to deny the explicit and unambiguous productivity boost utility classes such as <code class="highlighter-rouge">.text-center</code> provide. These classes break the semantic contract, but do so with obvious benefits.</p>
<p>Writing this all out has been helpful. I still think semantic html is important, but if I’m honest with myself, I’m open to the idea of unsemantic css. I’m ready to take the next step.</p>
<h2 id="enter-tailwind">Enter tailwind</h2>
<p>What I’m looking for is something simple and unobtrusive that lets me think in CSS without having to worry about organization or naming. This is where functional css enters the picture. Functional css says to-hell with semantic styles (mostly). Tools like tailwind generate thousands of css attribute specific utility classes. You then compose them in your html. You no longer create a <code class="highlighter-rouge">container</code> class. You apply <code class="highlighter-rouge">mx-auto max-w-lg</code>. Sounds promising!</p>
<p>But I need to be honest with you. The first 10 times I tried to consider tailwind, I was appalled. It seemed like a bait and switch. Sure, that looks fine for a hello world app, but how can that scale? What about responsive css? Animation? I shuddered to think of what a template would look like for any moderately complex design. However, enough people have strongly recommended this that I had to at least put it into practice before I completely wrote it off. So I set out to redo this website using tailwind. Here are some lessons now that I’ve finished:</p>
<h2 id="lessons">Lessons</h2>
<ul>
<li>Tailwind generates a lot of css. I was really concerned about its file size when I started. I wasted a lot of time trying to tweak the config to generate a smaller payload. It wasn’t worth it. Figure out how to setup a tool like <code class="highlighter-rouge">purgecss</code> instead. It will automatically strip unused classes from you css payload and save you a lot of time and kilobytes</li>
<li>Tailwind has the idea of composing its utility classes in css to generate component classes (think of bootstrap’s <code class="highlighter-rouge">.btn</code>). This is super handy. I used this same pattern for styling raw HTML elements as well. I wasn’t about to add utility classes to all the <code class="highlighter-rouge"><h1></code>’s in my markdown files! <a href="https://github.com/mattmcmanus/mattmcmanus.github.io/blob/master/src/tailwind.css#L51-L102">This is what I came up with</a></li>
<li>Tailwinds classes are mobile first. Lean into this and don’t fight it (for whatever reason, I did). Start with a mobile preview and work your way up. I was surprised by how effective the utility classes were for this.</li>
<li>If you find yourself duplicating a group of classes a lot, before considering creating a css component, explore templating options within your toolkit. Could that html be just as easily embedded through and partial or include rather than a dedicated component class name? Compositing the css classes is what makes tailwind quick and simple to use. Each new component slows you down a bit</li>
<li>Tailwind is still a work in progress. There are still gaps in its flexbox support and animations are nonexistent. It’s plugin system works well to fill in some spots, <a href="https://www.npmjs.com/package/glhd-tailwindcss-transitions">specifically for transitions</a>. However, I found the quality isn’t quite as high as the standard library and having to find them less than straight-forward</li>
<li>I found the quickest way to get used to the new classes is to keep it’s generated css open in separate a pane. Searching it for the css I wanted was the easiest way to figure out what the class names are. The numbering scheme, (<code class="highlighter-rouge">.mb-1</code> = <code class="highlighter-rouge">margin-bottom: .25rem</code> and <code class="highlighter-rouge">.mb-4</code> = <code class="highlighter-rouge">margin-bottom: 1rem</code>) took me a long time get used too. Why does 4 equal 1rem? It wasn’t intuitive at first</li>
</ul>
<p>All in all, I’m pleased with the outcome. I like how DRY and fast the CSS is. I LOVE how nicely it works with <code class="highlighter-rouge">purgecss</code>. I like how quickly I can sketch out designs. The big learning curve for me, and the thing that gives me the most pause, is <a href="https://github.com/mattmcmanus/mattmcmanus.github.io/blob/master/_layouts/book.html#L6">how gnarly the templates can get</a>.I think the framework’s component approach by using <code class="highlighter-rouge">@apply</code> is critical to address things. However, there is a subtlety to how and when to use it that’s still not completely clear to me.</p>
<p>Will I be switching any big apps to it anytime soon? No. Will I evaluate it on a new project? Definitely.</p>
<h3 id="acknowledgments">Acknowledgments</h3>
<p>Thanks to <a href="https://twitter.com/samselikoff">Sam Selikoff</a> and <a href="https://twitter.com/lukemelia">Luke Melia</a> for the feedback on this post.</p>Matt McManusI’ve been writing CSS for a long time. I like it and it makes sense to me. I’m often bewildered by folks who have such a hard time with it. I was raised on Eric Meyer’s and Jeffery Zeldman’s Web standards and semantic html purity laws. Those ideas are buried deep in my psyche. However, you may not have noticed, but web development has changed a lot in the last 20 years! I’ve learned many new things over that time, but it’s been a long time since I’ve evaluated where I stand with CSS. For this post, I’m not going to do a detailed how-to or deep dive. I’m going to walk you through some thoughts and observations I’ve had as I take my first stab at functional css. Let’s begin!Book Review: Tao Te Ching by Lao Tzu2018-08-20T00:00:00+00:002018-08-20T00:00:00+00:00https://mcmanus.io/2018/book-review-tao-te-ching<p>As I have had the opportunity to read some very old books, the smaller History feels to me. Why? I am realizing that these writings are still relevant and their wisdom is very practical. The Tao Te Ching, one of the oldest books I’ve read (written in ADE 125), further solidifies that belief.</p>
<p>Over the last several years, I have read a considerable amount of writing by Christian and Catholic mystics. A consistent thread in these writings is a respect for eastern religious practice. Also, in reading modern Buddhist contemplatives I have been surprised to find a reverence for the teachings of Jesus. This is what drew me to want to read the Tao Te Ching.</p>
<p>What would I find in something written close to the time the Christian Gospels? Would there be much overlap? Would there be anything that seems to connect to the heart of God that is revealed in the Bible? How would it express itself?</p>
<blockquote>
<p>There was something formless and perfect before the universe was born. It is serene. Empty. Solitary. Unchanging. Infinite. Eternally present. It is the mother of the universe. For lack of a better name, I call it the Tao. It flows through all things, inside and outside, and returns to the origin of all things. The Tao is great. The universe is great. Earth is great. Man is great. These are the four great powers. Man follows the earth. Earth follows the universe. The universe follows the Tao. The Tao follows only itself.</p>
</blockquote>
<p>That quote is a gentle and obvious intro to this overlap. The one area that it explores most fully (and that I enjoyed the most) is a playful exploration around the idea of non-being. This paradoxical idea has deep roots in all the mystical and contemplative traditions. I find it compelling and intriguing. It is such a proper counter-point and anchor to a culture hell-bent on constructing facades of “being”.</p>
<blockquote>
<p>If you want to become whole, let yourself be partial. If you want to become straight, let yourself be crooked. If you want to become full, let yourself be empty. If you want to be reborn, let yourself die. If you want to be given everything, give everything up. The Master, by residing in the Tao, sets an example for all beings. Because he doesn’t display himself, people can see his light. Because he has nothing to prove, people can trust his words. Because he doesn’t know who he is, people recognize themselves in him. Because he has no goal in mind, everything he does succeeds. When the ancient Masters said, “If you want to be given everything, give everything up,” they weren’t using empty phrases. Only in being lived by the Tao can you be truly yourself.</p>
</blockquote>
<p>It takes a lot of care and skill to try and speak about something that you can only describe as the absence of something. You need to dance around with lots of analogies and words to start to build an intuitive understanding of what it is. If this is the first time you’ve approached the topic, you may think that they are literally talking about nothing! Lean in, my friend!</p>
<blockquote>
<p>The gentlest thing in the world overcomes the hardest thing in the world. That which has no substance enters where there is no space. This shows the value of non-action.</p>
</blockquote>
<blockquote>
<p>True perfection seems imperfect, yet it is perfectly itself. True fullness seems empty, yet it is fully present.</p>
</blockquote>
<blockquote>
<p>Seeing into darkness is clarity. Knowing how to yield is strength. Use your own light and return to the source of light. This is called practicing eternity.</p>
</blockquote>
<p>Why do I care about this? There is this idea in the Christian Gospels about how true life only begins when you die. That you need to die to yourself to fully live. It’s a paradoxical idea and one that I see as a synonym of non-being. I find the commitment to this idea in the contemplative and eastern traditions inspiring. There is much to learn, as a Christian, from these traditions that would enrich our faith and the daily practice of it.</p>Matt McManusAs I have had the opportunity to read some very old books, the smaller History feels to me. Why? I am realizing that these writings are still relevant and their wisdom is very practical. The Tao Te Ching, one of the oldest books I’ve read (written in ADE 125), further solidifies that belief.Book Review: New Seeds of Contemplation by Thomas Merton2018-08-07T00:00:00+00:002018-08-07T00:00:00+00:00https://mcmanus.io/2018/book-review-new-seeds-of-contemplation-by-thomas-merton<p>I owe a great debt to Thomas Merton. His book, <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/175078.The_Seven_Storey_Mountain">The Seven Story Mountain</a> set me on a path towards the reconstruction of my faith. There are few authors who have challenged my understanding of the world and myself more than he has.</p>
<p>This book, New Seeds of Contemplation, is his attempt to explain the unexplainable. In it he explores the nature of God and how we become one with him through contemplation. What is contemplation? How is it different than prayer? Prayer tends to be very explicit and focused on the self. “I need help with…” “Give me…” “Give X to…” Contemplation is the emptying of one’s self and a bending of the will towards God, to share in and become one with his love.</p>
<p>I understand that sounds a bit strange. This topic can feel like the strange esoteric exercises of hermits and monks. In spite of this, I find myself compelled to continue to explore it. When I read the thoughts and experiences of Merton (among others) I begin to see experiences in my past with a new understanding.</p>
<p>For example, I often talk and write about how I nearly left the Christian faith. For a long time I considered that a bad thing, a result of weakness. I also viewed my coming to a new understanding of faith the correcting of a wrong. However, Merton describes a similar experience with a dramatically different evaluation of its quality:</p>
<blockquote>
<p>Let no one hope to find in contemplation an escape from conflict, from anguish or from doubt. On the contrary, the deep, inexpressible certitude of the contemplative experience awakens a tragic anguish and opens many questions in the depths of the heart like wounds that cannot stop bleeding. For every gain in deep certitude there is a corresponding growth of superficial “doubt.” This doubt is by no means opposed to genuine faith, but it mercilessly examines and questions the spurious “faith” of everyday life, the human faith which is nothing but the passive acceptance of conventional opinion. This false “faith” which is what we often live by and which we even come to confuse with our “religion” is subjected to inexorable questioning. This torment is a kind of trial by fire in which we are compelled, by the very light of invisible truth which has reached us in the dark ray of contemplation, to examine, to doubt and finally to reject all the prejudices and conventions that we have hitherto accepted as if they were dogmas.</p>
<p><cite>Merton, Thomas. New Seeds of Contemplation (pp. 13-14). New Directions. Kindle Edition.</cite></p>
</blockquote>
<p>Part of why I considered my struggle so bad, was that I viewed my doubt as a failure of faith. Merton, again, has a different perspective:</p>
<blockquote>
<p>You cannot be a man of faith unless you know how to doubt. You cannot believe in God unless you are capable of questioning the authority of prejudice, even though that prejudice may seem to be religious. Faith is not blind conformity to a prejudice—a “pre-judgment.” It is a decision, a judgment that is fully and deliberately taken in the light of a truth that cannot be proven. It is not merely the acceptance of a decision that has been made by somebody else.</p>
<p>A “FAITH” that merely confirms us in opinionatedness and self-complacency may well be an expression of theological doubt. True faith is never merely a source of spiritual comfort. It may indeed bring peace, but before it does so it must involve us in struggle. A “faith” that avoids this struggle is really a temptation against true faith.</p>
<p><cite>Merton, Thomas. New Seeds of Contemplation (pp. 107-108). New Directions. Kindle Edition.</cite></p>
</blockquote>
<p>It might be easy to dismiss all this by saying I was in crisis and was seeking anything to make things seem a little easier and to feel less guilty. I’ve wondered this myself. However, I am now years into this process and I can say now that my perspective has truly changed and I have Merton to thank. I see that period in my past not as one of failure, but one of darkness. It did not come as a result of failure, but from a loving God whose wisdom allows for growth to be born out of struggle. My understanding of who I was and what I thought my faith should be were hindrances to loving God more completely. When it was taken all away, for a time, I was left with nothing, which allowed me to start to see things as they could be.</p>
<p>That is why Merton’s work on contemplation is so compelling. You cannot talk about contemplation without embracing the reality of darkness and unknowing. My previous understanding of faith had no room for that. Even so, I cannot tell you where I have had a true contemplative experience. But when I read accounts of those who have devoted their life to the practice, I hear and feel echos of my own experience. Not trivial flashes of emotion here and there, but some of the most acute and painful moments of my life. I still don’t fully understand it all, but I know as I continue down this path, I am encouraged and I hope good will come of it.</p>Matt McManusI owe a great debt to Thomas Merton. His book, The Seven Story Mountain set me on a path towards the reconstruction of my faith. There are few authors who have challenged my understanding of the world and myself more than he has.Book Review: The Souls of Black Folk by W.E.B. Du Bois2018-07-26T00:00:00+00:002018-07-26T00:00:00+00:00https://mcmanus.io/2018/book-review-the-souls-of-black-folk-by-web-debois<p>This beautiful book, written in 1903, is about race and America. It is a collection of essays; some history, some critique, some stories, some journals. They are gathered together to form a comprehensive picture of life for the African American at the turn of the 20th century. It’s author, <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/W._E._B._Du_Bois">W.E.B. De Bois</a> was an American sociologist, historian, civil rights activist, Pan-Africanist, author, writer and editor.</p>
<p>Reading this book shook me and, more than once, left me speechless. However, this book is not a shocking book, full of the horrors of racism and America’s dark past. What shook me was the shear strength of character, integrity and humanity of De Bois. His prose is elegant, his observations keen and balanced, his conclusions measured, his stance humble. However, he is not passive, not content with the status quo and not very interested with sacrificial compromise.</p>
<blockquote>
<p>After the Egyptian and Indian, the Greek and Roman, the Teuton and Mongolian, the Negro is a sort of seventh son, born with a veil, and gifted with second-sight in this American world,—a world which yields him no true self-consciousness, but only lets him see himself through the revelation of the other world. It is a peculiar sensation, this double-consciousness, this sense of always looking at one’s self through the eyes of others, of measuring one by the tape of a world that looks on in amused contempt and pity. One ever feels his two-ness,—an American, a Negro… two thoughts, two unreconciled strivings; two warring ideals in one dark body, whose dogged strength alone keeps it from being torn asunder.</p>
</blockquote>
<blockquote>
<p>The history of the American Negro is the history of this strife, — this longing to attain self-conscious manhood, to merge his double self into a better and truer self.</p>
</blockquote>
<p>Du Bois has much and more to say about race in America over 100 years later. Similar to Between the world and me, it builds an unshakable picture of life for people of color in the United States. DuBois describes the internal mindset and self image that has developed in a culture with the baggage America has with race. This clearer understanding forced me to wrestle with my own self image and and acknowledge the role being white plays in my understanding of the world. That is why I find this book so important. Genuine opportunities for personal insight as a result of the lived perspective of another person are a gift. I am extremely thankful for the gift that I found in this book.</p>Matt McManusThis beautiful book, written in 1903, is about race and America. It is a collection of essays; some history, some critique, some stories, some journals. They are gathered together to form a comprehensive picture of life for the African American at the turn of the 20th century. It’s author, W.E.B. De Bois was an American sociologist, historian, civil rights activist, Pan-Africanist, author, writer and editor.Book Review: Peace is Every Step by Thích Nhất Hạnh2018-07-21T00:00:00+00:002018-07-21T00:00:00+00:00https://mcmanus.io/2018/book-review-peace-is-every-step-by-thich-nhat-hanh<p>This is the second book I’ve read by Hạnh, the first being <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/73184.Living_Buddha_Living_Christ">Living Buddha, Living Christ</a>. To those unfamiliar, Hạnh is a buddhist monk from Vietnam. He became a well known peace activist during the Vietnam work<sup><a href="#footnote1">[1]</a></sup>. During that time, he worked with the likes of Martin Luther King Jr<sup><a href="#footnote2">[2]</a></sup> and Thomas Merton<sup><a href="#footnote3">[3]</a></sup>.</p>
<p>I have been deeply affected by King and Merton, which is what piqued my interest in Hạnh. I’ve also grown in respect for many of the tenants of Buddhism that I’ve come to understand. Yet, I want to be clear upfront, I read Hahn as a Christian, looking to grow further in my Christian faith. I do so not adversarially, looking for weaknesses or contradictions. I do so out of a posture of hopeful admiration. Trusting that all truth is God’s truth. Believing that my faith, and the tradition it has grown out of, has a limited perspective, constrained by culture and history. Searching for perspectives that will challenge me to reconsider my assumptions.</p>
<blockquote>
<p>Walk as if you are kissing the Earth with your feet.</p>
</blockquote>
<p>This book is a gentle and charming walk through the principles of mindfulness, inter-being (how everything is connected) and living non-violently. It is an exploration in how “right” living will lead to “right” thinking. Orthopraxy to Orthodoxy for you christian nerds. I find that much of what Hạnh discusses can be fully integrated into christian beliefs. In fact, it has been instrumental for me in maintaining many of them. This is because so much of it focuses on practical, tangible actions. Stop, breathe, let go. There is no special prayer to say, no confused expectation of whether it will be answered. Just breathing. Sitting. Acknowledging your emotions and letting go of them.</p>
<p>This may have been obvious to you, but I always considered prayer an active, internal speaking of words . It’s been through the words of Hahn and monks of many other traditions that the view has changed. I’ve learned that prayer is broader, subtler and much quieter than I ever realized it could be. To sit still and silent, with my heart bent towards the love of the father, is as “spiritual” and important as saying the Lords prayer. The Hebrew word for the Holy Spirit is <em>ruach</em>, which translates to “air in motion”, or simply, breath. To focus on my breath is to connect with the Holy Spirit. These practices have shifted my faith from being one of the head to one of the heart.</p>
<p>Please, consider giving this short book a read. The language may seem flowery or indirect if you’re unfamiliar, but stick with it. They all work together to build a cohesive pattern of thought that is worth internalizing.</p>
<h3 id="footnotes-and-interesting-links">Footnotes and interesting links</h3>
<ul>
<li><a name="footnote1">1</a>: <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Th%C3%ADch_Nh%E1%BA%A5t_H%E1%BA%A1nh#During_the_Vietnam_War">Wikipedia Article on Hạnh</a></li>
<li><a name="footnote2">2</a>: <a href="http://www.hartford-hwp.com/archives/45a/025.html">Nomination of Thich Nhat Hanh for the Nobel Peace Prize By Martin Luther King, Jr., 25 January 1967</a></li>
<li><a name="footnote3">3</a>: <a href="https://www.buddhistdoor.net/features/nhat-hanh-is-my-brother">“Nhat Hanh is my Brother” by Thomas Merton</a></li>
<li><a href="https://orderofinterbeing.org/for-the-aspirant/fourteen-mindfulness-trainings/">The Fourteen Mindfulness Trainings of the Order of Interbeing</a></li>
</ul>Matt McManusThis is the second book I’ve read by Hạnh, the first being Living Buddha, Living Christ. To those unfamiliar, Hạnh is a buddhist monk from Vietnam. He became a well known peace activist during the Vietnam work[1]. During that time, he worked with the likes of Martin Luther King Jr[2] and Thomas Merton[3].Antigua, Guatemala2018-06-28T00:00:00+00:002018-06-28T00:00:00+00:00https://mcmanus.io/2018/antiqua-guatemala<p>In a few days, I will be leaving with my wife and two kids on an adventure. For two months we will be living and working in Antigua, Guatemala. An opportunity crossed our paths that was too good to pass up! I work remotely for my company so why not take advantage?</p>
<p>To some, a trip like this is an unflinching no-brainer. How could you not go?! To others, this trip is the risky and surprising result of questionable decision making. For a long time, I was unequivocally against it. Becoming a husband and father have brought into exquisite relief the depths of my fear and anxiety. Something like this seemed impossible. However, time, wise counsel, and many conversations with my wife have done much to soften this stubborn, fearful heart. This trip is happening. We leave in two days. I am excited.</p>
<p>This post is a sort of ebenezer, a sign post or remembrance of an acute time and place. It is a reminder to myself of how much I’ve grown. As I’ve learned not to be ruled by fear, I am opening myself to discover a life with the potential for wonder. This trip is a testament of the hope that makes wonder possible.</p>Matt McManusIn a few days, I will be leaving with my wife and two kids on an adventure. For two months we will be living and working in Antigua, Guatemala. An opportunity crossed our paths that was too good to pass up! I work remotely for my company so why not take advantage?Book Review: Childhood’s End by Arthur C. Clarke2018-05-28T20:19:00+00:002018-05-28T20:19:00+00:00https://mcmanus.io/2018/book-review-childhoods-end-by-arthur-c-clarke<blockquote>
<p>This was the moment when history held its breath, and the present sheared asunder from the past as an iceberg splits from its frozen, parent cliffs, and goes sailing out to sea in lonely pride.</p>
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<p>Perspective is a fickle thing. You can go about your days thinking you’re engaged with your life, working towards increasing in knowledge & understanding, feeling like you’ve done a good job mining the depths of yourself and what it means to be human. Then, as if a freight train has passed with in inches of your face, you are startled into awareness that you are nothing more than kid swimming in a back yard kiddie pool.</p>
<p>For me, Childhood’s End is the freight train and Arthur C. Clarke is the conductor.</p>
<p>To any fan of SciFi, the premise of this book is simple, it’s concepts familiar, and it’s characters relatable. However, it’s profoundly engaging and completely delightful. At some point you realize this book was written in 1953 and you’re hit by the train.</p>
<p>Clarke is a master.</p>
<p>I’ve had long, involved conversations with several people about this book. Each one about different aspects of it. Many about thoughts that seemed like throw-aways during the course of the story but had a depth that only revealed itself over time.</p>
<p>I will read this book again and probably very soon.</p>Matt McManusThis was the moment when history held its breath, and the present sheared asunder from the past as an iceberg splits from its frozen, parent cliffs, and goes sailing out to sea in lonely pride.Book Review: Mother Night by Kurt Vonnegut2018-05-28T19:19:00+00:002018-05-28T19:19:00+00:00https://mcmanus.io/2018/book-review-mother-night-by-kurt-vonnegut<p>I attended a book swap party for a friend and I came home with this book. I’d never heard of it, but how could I not be interested in Vonnegut?</p>
<p>This short book is wonderful. It’s nothing like I expected and everything I could have hoped for. In it, you follow the story of Howard Campbell Jr, as told by himself while in prison for war crimes committed during World War II. He was a master propagandist for the Nazis who claims to be an American spy. The reality is he was very good at both. The heart of the story is the exploration personal disintegration. As Vonnegut warns in the beginning of the book: “You are who you pretend to be.”</p>
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<p>The dismaying thing about the classic totalitarian mind is that any given gear, though mutilated, will have at its circumference unbroken sequences of teeth that are immaculately maintained, that are exquisitely machined. Hence the cuckoo clock in Hell—keeping perfect time for eight minutes and thirty-three seconds, jumping ahead fourteen minutes, keeping perfect time for six seconds, jumping ahead two seconds, keeping perfect time for two hours and one second, then jumping ahead a year. The missing teeth, of course, are simple, obvious truths, truths available and comprehensible even to ten-year-olds, in most cases.</p>
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<p>What caught me off guard, was how a book that touches on so many of the ugliest parts of war is so full of compassion. The cast of characters is comical. A Nazi/American double agent, an unrepentant white nationalist and anti-Semite, a woman who tries to take over the life of her dead sister, a Russian spy who abuses his best friend, a drunk, excommunicated priest, and more. All of them sad, broken and ugly but all treated with compassion by Vonnegut. None flatly evil. All conflicted, full of potential but broken by war.</p>Matt McManusI attended a book swap party for a friend and I came home with this book. I’d never heard of it, but how could I not be interested in Vonnegut?